Chapter ~12: Nishkarsh

No! I can’t fall for her.

We are not made for each other and most important our life styles are north-south.

She was born with silver spoon whereas I with a stained steel one.

She is a googly fun-loving girl whereas I am a geek.

She is beautiful, charming half of the class is madly behind her whereas I am just a nerdy lower-middleclass boy.

She is just like goddess whereas I am mere a servant.

I don’t deserve her. She deserves much better person than me.

I stand nowhere in front of her.

But I use to forget all this when she boldly encounters every taunt of mine with her playful-flirty replies.

I don’t like her and that’s it!

‘Ya! Ya! Then who was blushing when she implied that she had joined the study group only for you’ my subconscious mind mocked.

Really! Was it my mind or is possessed by someone.

Never, like never in my life it took my side.

Wonder, if it is mine or not.

I stood up from my bed with full of rage and sworn that ‘I Nishkarsh will never fall for her.’

“He really has lost his brain due to studied.” I heard my young sibling Subh murmur to himself, who was give me a ‘have you lost my mind look.’

I cleared my throat and asked “Have you completed your homework?”

He nodded.

I again asked “Your target of the day?”

He shook her head.

I change my expression to the serous ones “Reason, young man!”

He tilted his head to the right and then to the left.

What is wrong with him today?

I raise my left eyebrow while demanding answer.

“What if” he paused “What if, I lost my mind like you all due to studies?”

“And why do you think that I, you big brother, have lost my mind?” I glared at him.

“Since few days I am watching you. You are acting weird. You always seem lost-lost. You smile without a reason then out of sudden you expression changes to serious one and then your ears become red.” He said while giving me a goofy look.

“It just- It is that- just” I stopped and all of sudden a realisation hit me hard.

It all because of her, since she had joined the study group.

I looked at my young brother who was waiting for an answer.

“It just nothing, YOU GO AND COMPLETE YOUR TARGET!” I literally shouted on him.

He just shook his head and said “These elders now a days.” And sat on his study table.

I looked around at my house which consists one room, which is shared by my mother, me and my young brother, one kitchen one bathroom plus washroom that’s it and she live in a house-no bungalow-no palace, yes palace is correct way to say to the place where she lives.

People like me can never afford it.

Out of sudden my phone rang; it was none other than Anshi.

This girl will really love sucking my blood.

I pick up the call and hear her roaring at me “WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?”

“Well, hello to you too and I am on my way.” I said and hung up.

“Why the hell did you set my phone clock half hour early?” I demanded answer from Anshi.

She gives me a bore look while munching popcorn.

I huffed; she won’t reply to me I know.

We waited for them…

Waited…

Waited…

And

Waited…

Waited…

We were waiting for them for 45 minutes and still they are not here.

Then only I saw two girls coming toward us.

She, no!

Be in your sense, she is looking aver-ravish, uhh! No

She NOT looking ravish...

I just drank my words when I saw her standing just beside me.

Beside me in that, No!

Control Nishkarsh!

Fisalna nahi hai!

“Welcome Late commers!” I taunted them.

I can sense some evil vibes coming from my two best friends.

Then only Shrutika start giving some this and that, but that stupid girl was just staring at me.

What the hell was her problem?

I looked at her with an irritated look and then what she did just blew my mind off.

She just wink!

Wink at me!

She winks at me!

OH MY GOD!

A girl none other than Vanshika, winked.

It’s just normal right.

Alright it’s normal to wink, I bet something was in her right eye.

It wasn’t wink, it just something was in her eyes.

Ya! This was it. Some this was in her eyes and she just dusted it off that’s why she winked.

It was not for me.

“Whao! She is full of energy.” Aarav said.

Then only I realised that since she winked at me, I was just lost in her thoughts.

It wasn’t actually her thoughts, though. It was just a confusion.

Uhh!

What the hell is wrong with me? Why I am non-sensibly blabbering in my head?

I just shook my head but a small smile came to my face when her smile and the wink replayed in my head.

“let’s take drinks and popcorn bro.” I said and we walked towards the counter.

We took three popcorn buckets and 5 cups of coke.

And here the sitting mission started.

We had booked five seats of a row.

Anshi was trying hard to make Aarav and Shrutika, sit together.

At last, it happened.

Anshi was sitting in between with her own popcorn tub and coke, on right Shrutika then Aarav, on left its Vanshika and…

It none other than me.

I was about to seat beside Vanshika, the girl from whom, I was running hard just to get away.

Wait! If I sat beside her that means…

That means it’s our first movie date.

 Oh, shut up Nishkarsh.

Have I really lost my mind. What the hell is wrong with my mind.

It’s just a friend- no not friends, umm, friends-friend movie outing.

SHE IS SHRUTIKA’S, MY BEST FRIEND’S LOVER, FRIEND.

That’s it!

I took a deep breath and sat on the seat beside her.

How bad it can be?

It not only bad, it’s worst.

Our hands touch each other’s twice, and eyes more than thrice.

Now, I won’t take any popcorn. I will only concentrate in movie.

“Listen,” she spoke out of sudden in middle of movie.

I ignored her.

She again said “I want to talk to you.”

She wants to talk to me, about what?

I looked at her and give a nod to continue.

“We know each other since sixth grade yet we haven’t talk properly till now but, umm,” She paused.

I was forcing myself not to look at her otherwise….

“Actually, I lik-“

“No!” I snapped

Thank god I cut it out otherwise something drastic would have happened like- me saying yes.

“This can’t work!” I told her.

“But why? Why do you think that it can’t work?” She questioned me “If we want then it can.” She said while convincing me.

No, it cannot work. Our life is lot more different than you can ever think.

“I can’t date a candy.” I said lazily.

I am sorry!
“You know” I looked directly into her eyes and continue “You are an after-marriage affair types material or we can say a short-term satisfying material but long term, nah! It boring with you.”

Her nose flared, she was shivering in anger, her eyes were red.

Yes! Get angry more angry.

Just one more thing than she will definitely hate me

“I know what girls like you want.” I said while touching knuckles on her bare skin.

Slapping sound echoed in the theatre.

She gets up and left...

I behaved like nothing happen but everything destroyed.

I made her hate me as per my plan but it hurst, deep down in my heart it hurts.

It’s good.!

There is nothing to regret and I deserve that slap.

Out of sudden Anshika grabbed my collar and dragged me outside.

My mind was too full to think where she was taking me to.

In no time a punch landed right across my jaw.

It hurts!

It shouldn’t hurt, but it hurts.

Why it is hurting? She was no one to me. I wasn’t having any feeling for her right.

I can’t have any feeling.

‘Are you sure?’ My subconscious mind questioned.

“Nish, what the hell have you done?” Aarav questioned while handling Anshika.

“It-It just-” I tried to throw out the words from my throat but they were stuck.

I looked in front of me my two best friends, who can do anything for me.

“Leave me alone.” I said and walked away.

I can’t tell them what my dad had done.

That’s my problem any only I have to fix it. I can’t let anyone be involve in it.

I start walking. I don’t know where I was going but I do know that I was going far away from everyone.

I have to do it.

I clutch the paper which was burning my pocket this whole time.

This whole time I use to thing that my father died in an accident but that wasn’t true.

I fall on my knees.

Tears weren’t coming out from my eyes.

What have you done, you destroyed your son’s life.

Why

Why

Why

“WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!”